Further to Ian Pettigrew's pyrotechnic daks, I remember the allure of the bomb was my undoing as a science monitor. Being a science monitor had two advantages: free run of the prep room with its Alladin's cave of chemicals and being excused from school assemblies( in order to clean up the prep room).

One day while assembly was in progress, I was in the upstairs prep room (in what I thought was a deserted building) and found a bottle of grey powder marked 'gun powder'. Only one way to check it out. I filled a match box with the gun powder and inserted a few inches of the yellow dynamite fuse which was retailed on the school black market. (I can't remember who sold this stuff but I'm sure someone will). I sat the matchbox on a bench in the lab, lit the fuse and stood back. At that moment Billy Butts (one of the worlds best science teachers) walked in.

As we both stared at each other, the thing went off and filled the room with smoke. Even after 40 years I can't think of a line that would have got me off the hook. Arkward interview with Bolton and back to assemblies for me.